Oof! Blog! Argh!

You know who I hate? This motherfucker right over here

Occasional Superheroine is almost enough to make me take down my “No Girls Allowed” sign. Almost.

The Underwire reports that Mickey Rourke may play the Crimson Dynamo in Iron Man 2. If you saw him in The Wrestler, I think you can eagerly anticipate threatening Russian-accented dialogue mumbled nearly incoherently, but his hair will be awesome. There were at least 12 incarnations of the Crimson Dynamo, which is about as many career comebacks Mickey Rourke has attempted.

Here is more change we can believe in: the new Doctor Who is about to be announced during an upcoming episode of Doctor Who: Confidential.

In the Doctor Who special, to be aired tomorrow at 17.35hrs, the actor playing the new Doctor will be giving his or her initial reaction to being the new, eleventh incarnation of one of television’s most loved characters.

That 17.35hrs is metric, so I’m not sure how that translates to feet or miles. Neat how they drop the “his or her” in there. Phh. As if a girl could be Doctor Who. How about this: when women can be real doctors, then - and only then - can they play them on TV.

EDIT: They picked young slightly swollen Morrissey!

ComicMix points to the The Ender series coming from Marvel. If you haven’t read them, the Ender books are a great series written by Orson Scott Card, a gifted and talented writer who is perpetually off his meds.

When he isn’t writing sci-fi, OSC rails against gay marriage, Barack Obama, and other equally implausible end-of-the-world scenarios. Heaven knows I fully support OSC’s right to spout whatever ridiculous bullshit he likes, I just think he writes more lucid and believable science fiction than columns on public policy. His statement of beliefs is all well and good until you reach the end to find out that it is all based on some hybrid of Christianity, Star Trek, and suppressing rights for homosexuals. OSC would like to see one man, one woman - you know, like in the Bible, or on Who Wants To Marry A Millionaire.

In any case, Ender’s Game: Good. Orson Scott Card: nutbag.

The story starts after the Smurfs invasion of Gargamel’s Castle. They finally captured and killed him, as well as his cat Azrael. As a trophy, the cat’s preserved body was put at the center of the village’s main square, as a reminder of Dark Times forever gone, or so they thought…

Ignore the network it is on, just watch it. That is all.

Anne Hathaway is cute enough - I mean, she’s no Katee Sackhoff but whatever, some people find her attractive I guess - but she has an odd sense of fun. Here is her pitch for the Get Smart sequel:

I’d love to see something happen to 99 where her heart gets broken, and you see her have a complete emotional collapse. That could be really funny.

Oh yeah - that would be hilarious!

Note to self: Do not let Anne Hathaway book the talent for little Jimmy’s 6th birthday. “Hey kids! I brought Saw!”

Bam! Kapow! - the second coolest comic book onomatopoeia URL in existence - is certainly not pandering when they show us the top 10 skimpiest female superhero costumes.

Less of a draw, but of more interest is the Wolverine vs. Hulk fan art. Nice to see since we’ll never see another issue in that series.

Hypergeek begins a catalog of The A-Z of Canadian Comic Book Creators. I know one that starts with “H” that I hope he doesn’t miss. I had the good fortune of growing up in the John Byrne years, and his X-Men remain the defining ones for me.

ComicMix points to what might have been - an animated version of Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

Ummm. Heaven knows I love Faith Erin Hicks more than a zombie loves the taste of human flesh, but does the description of The War At Ellsemere sound oddly familiar? Poor kid wins scholarship to elite school filled with mystery and intrigue. There may or may not be something living in the creepy forest near the school, and one of the kids hates that pesky Harry Po… errr, Juniper.

In any case, I’ll be plunking down my money for this one, as I have faith (ha! see what I did there?) that this will be as much fun as Zombies Calling.

Also, as you listen to the interview above, please note that FEH’s English is nearly perfect.

Doctor Who episodes previously only available on VHS, are now available on iTunes. Not much more to add to that, I guess. If you are a fan of the cardboard-box style Dalek, then get your $7.96 (approximately Є1 at today’s exchange rate) ready to buy rarities like The Krotons and Terror of the Autons.

If anything could drag me out of my non-blogging doldrums, it would be Faith Erin Hicks releasing a new graphic novel. I’ve raved about Zombies Calling, I’ve pined helplessly that Americans are apparently forbidden to read her newspaper comic strip, I’ve wished her the best of luck in winning possibly meaningless Canadian Awards, and I’ve written other things about her that I think are just plain funny. To be fair, The War At Ellsmere isn’t due out until December, but it is getting closer, so it might be best to stake out your place in line.

Here’s what I’d like to see happen: I’d like TWAE to be so well received here in the States that Ms Hicks turns south, walks across that border and never looks back. I want her to feel so loved by American that she hits a Mountie with her last hockey puck on the way to Buffalo.

Watchmen trailer! zOMG Watchmen! Watchmen! Watchmen! Watchmen!

Did you hear yet? Watchmen!

Apple has a profile of Dark Horse Comics, where they outline how DH utilizes their 150+ Macs to create such things as Buffy, Hellboy, and The Goon. They outline the production process and trace their use of lossy image formats, and the archaic and insecure Eff-Tee-Pee:

• Once the layouts are approved, Fegredo draws tight pencils. He scans them and sends JPEGs to Allie and Mignola for approval. Mignola writes final dialog and, using a pencil and black marker, roughs out word-balloon placement on printouts of the pencils.
• The Dark Horse team scans the word balloon placements, types up the script, and places that material, plus scans of the tight pencils, on the company’s FTP server.
• Fegredo downloads the pencil scans, prints them out, and inks the drawings. He scans the inked drawings, cleans and tweaks them digitally as needed, and FTPs them back to Dark Horse.

So there ya go. Your early preview of DH properties is just a network sniff away. I wonder if Fegredo has an open wireless access point, too…